Category Archives: Lifestyle

Successful blogger laughs hysterically at own posts dozens of times a day

BLOGOSPHERE—Saying that she’s bored of every WordPress blog except her own, successful blogger Sheryl Sans-Blurb reads her own blog posts dozens of times a day, guffawing maniacally between moments of barely suppressed giggles. “I love reading my own stuff because it’s so exciting,” she gushed. “I’m passionate like that.” Sans-Blurb has increased her blog viewership by 1200% using this strategy, and

Read more

Man who killed Hugh Hefner gets all the girls now

LOS ANGELES—The man who assassinated Hugh Hefner is reportedly cavorting and fornicating with scores of ebullient, barely legal, scantily-clad women who until recently lived with the founder of the Playboy empire. Mike Ehrmantraut, 69, infiltrated the Playboy Mansion in Holmby Hills more than a week ago, using only his wrinkled old fingers as lock picks to break into a secret

Read more

Surgeon General warns young women pouring antifreeze on tampons

WASHINGTON—The U.S. Surgeon General called for action to reduce the number of tampon users using antifreeze as a blood substitute, noting antifreeze has been the liquid of choice among those who use tampons for the past few decades. The nation’s top gynecologist, Dr. Stephanie Miracle, cautioned women who engage in such risky behavior. She states, “Ethylene glycol, or antifreeze, is poisonous and is

Read more

IKEA offers high-quality, unassembled pork chops

SINGAPORE—Hungry IKEA customers can now order a plate of unassembled pork chops made of Scandinavian pine and eco-friendly rubber at any of the furniture brand’s restaurants. “People used to say everything here’s cardboard,” said IKEA CEO Peter Agnefjäll. “But we’ve proved them wrong. Here at IKEA, we are proud to present to you our new line of Nordic-inspired pork dishes,

Read more
« Older Entries Recent Entries »