LOS ANGELES—The man who assassinated Hugh Hefner is reportedly cavorting and fornicating with scores of ebullient, barely legal, scantily-clad women who until recently lived with the founder of the Playboy empire. Mike Ehrmantraut, 69, infiltrated the Playboy Mansion in Holmby… Read More ›
NASHVILLE, TN—Suspecting that something funny is going on with his wife, an Internal Revenue Service agent purposefully came home early to catch his wife in the act. “Motherfucker, I knew you were cheating on your taxes,” he yelled. Salvatore Goodman,… Read More ›
ALBUQUERQUE—A methamphetamine manufacturer tried to kill a cockroach by means of chemical disincorporation. He failed to do so, and is still looking for a polyurethane container big enough to fit the cockroach. After accidentally breaking a bad fly swatter, Jamie… Read More ›
ALBUQUERQUE—After falling victim to a massive Ponzi Scheme, three men are looking to alleviate their financial troubles by selling their lush eyebrows to the wig company Romero Wigs. “When I was just a little boy, my mother would read me… Read More ›
ALBUQUERQUE—Having had enough of your bullshit, a customer service assistant “just snapped” yesterday and swore that he will, at an unspecified time in the future, repeatedly stab you in the throat with his Bic ballpoint pen. Jerry, who is an… Read More ›
